still remember back then

but because of i feel lonely at home sometimes i would lie to them that i got extra class, so after school i probably just went wander off somewhere with friends or just alone. there's nothing to do at home, i couldn't watched tv when he's around. most of what he watched on tv was football and i'm not really into those kind of sport..thinking back those day's when i really wanted so badly to watched a tv or play video games i asked his permission first. now..i did told you that i'm not close with dad and couldn't talked to him..even if i talked only like one or two words came out from my mouth...so it's kinda funny.. we lived in the same house ..but the only way i can talked to him or asked a



permission is by asking my mom to asked for me..or i wrote a letter to my dad..gave it to mom and asked mom to passed it to dad..huh~ it's like living with a jail guard or like passing a letter to a government sector mcm ada process2nya...ehe~ sometimes klau hari minggu2 as i was slleping so soundly like a corpse on the sofa ehem biasa dah tidur tempat living room coz my room don't have fan's so it's hot plus believed it or not i still sleeping in the same bed with mom and dad untill i was 13 ehe~ they couldn't leave me aven a single minute from they're eyes..anyway when time minggu2 like i said ..as i was sleeping soundly on the sofa, he always main lagu2 cassete yang lagu2 disco, habis begagar rumah and sofa tempat ku tidur. before he got these cassete player that attached to two huge speaker..imagine how i felt..when i need a rest and sleep he started to play and turned the speaker to max. i was really frustrated...i even shout and screaming under the pillows, punching the side of the sofa like a crazy maniac. gosh~


i told you i was sleeping in the same room ...same bed with my parent's at 12 or 13 so when i was studying for exam in the room, he purposely turned off the lights out, i'm really pissed but what to do...i grabbed a torch light and started studying in the dark..no way i'm gonna study in the living room alone~ then when i got a good performance and grade at school i actually demanded a gift because at that age i'm beginning to be able to talked to him abit. i wanted him to buy me a ps1 ...and he did...that make me so happy like floating in heaven...then a year after that i asked him to buy a computer..which i didn't like coz it was old model and run so slow but i do appreciated him for that.

disiplin dan strict rules nearly torn me apart

aku tak tahu kenapa aku nakal sejak di bangku sekolah, mungkin aku kesepian dan menginginkan perhatian yang penuh dari kedua orang tuaku, memang sebagai seorang anak tunggal aku di berikan sepenuh perhatian tetapi kadang2 aku juga merasa sunyi mungkin kerana aku tak punya abang, kakak atau adik untuk bermesra. kadang2 aku akan menjadi nakal dan memberontak, adakah kerana aku inginkan perhatian penuh ataupun inginkan kelonggaran dari perhatian mereka? sejak kecil aku telah di ajar berdisiplin oleh ayah but it doesn't work like that..it doesn't work when parent's started to dicipline you with harsh words and to think they can controlled my manner with a belt is



not really a good way to do it. why? is it because they are the parent's , older people that we should respect and be scared of? don't get me the wrong way..i respect them and still am now...but because of the strict rules that dad made like i couldn't go out with friends, i can't stay on the phone for 15 minutes and that goes to my mom too coz he's worried about the bill's (better if he just throw the phone la..if he don't want to use it) i had to go back home straight at the exact time and if i am late he surely angry or probably closed the gate, sleeping at the kitchen or living room. it did happened to me before, and for these i feel like i wanted to just ran far away from him. still remember the night when i was around 11 or 12 , he was so totally angry with mom ..i couldn't remember about what...he started to yelled and throwing things at mom..so ofcoz i defended my mom by yelling at him too, that makes him even angrier...he started to throw some blanket, pillows etc to us and make us slept in the kitchen. i was so angry at that time.. and told mom that if he keep doing these i surely ranaway. guess mom told him about that and mom told me that he was abit scared by my threat. i don't really care what he thinks,

rokok yang pertama

hidup menjadi anak tunggal bukanlah mudah seperti yang di sangkakan, hidupku semasa kecil penuh dengan kesunyian dan hanya ibu dan ayahku menjadi teman seharian. aku adalah seorang yang pemalu dan tak mudah untuk bergaul dengan sesiapa terutama sekali di kalangan saudara mara. padaku aku lebih rapat dengan teman persekolahan dari saudara dan sepupuku sendiri. hubungan aku dan ayahku tak rapat sangat. aku dan ayahku jarang sekali berbual dan kadang2 dalam sehari cuma sepatah kata yang bisa di katakan..namun demikian hubungan



aku dgn ibu ku amat rapat, sebagai kanak2 memang biasa lah menjadi nakal cuma kadang2 membuatkan kedua org tuaku marah. dahulu ibu sering membawa ku ke tempat kerja semasa musim cuti sekolah. ibu pada masa itu bekerja sebagai tukang masak di salah sebuah sekolah menengah. setiap kali bekerja ibu sering memberi ku kertas untuk ku tulis dan menconteng. dan kadang2 aku akan pergi keluar dapur dan berjalan2 sekitar sekolah...aku masih teringat waktu dahulu aku sedang duduk di bangku sekolah dan dua pelajar perempuan sana menghampiriku. mereka cuba untuk berbual namun aku cuma mendiamkan diri. kadang2 aku akan bersembunyi kerana terlalu malu sangat. dahulu juga teman2 ibuku juga sering menjaga ku jika ketika itu ibu sedang sibuk. teman ibu semua baik2 terhadapku dan ini menyebabkan aku rapat sedikit dengan mereka. ada satu teman ibu suka sangat merokok. masa tu aku sedang asyik melihat teman ibu, apa tidaknya aneh melihat asap yang keluar dari mulut dan hidungnya..aku keliru dan terasa ingin mencubanya. so pada masa mereka sedang sibuk bekerja aku mengambil peluang itu untuk mengambil sebatang rokok yang ada di dlm beg teman ibu. aku menyimpannya di dalam baju dan membawanya pulang. setibanya pulang aku terus pergi ke dalam tandas untuk mencubanya.. namun nasibku tak begitu baik , pada masa itu aku baru menghirup asap rokok yg pertama ...dan pada masa itu juga ibuku masuk kedalam tandas dengan pantas. aku terkejut melihat ibu ketika itu. ibu nampak rokok yang ku pegang namun dia tak berkata apa2 lalu beredar pergi. aku menjadi panic takut ibu akan memberitahu hal itu pada ayah. jika ayah tahu sudah tentu aku akan di marahi dan di pukul. lalu ku buang rokok tadi ke dalam tandas. mungkin ibu tak memberitahu hal itu pada ayah ataupun ayah tak mahu ambil tahu kerana hal itu tidak pernah di bangkit kan oleh kedua org tuaku.

today : harimau and jelangkung

hariani aku bangun awal..mcm biasa aku mandi awal and terus keluar bagi makan harimau kesayanganku ku..mun nda di bagi makan mengamuk kaliah...harimau ku ani kiut biut muanya .. di malam nda ku betidur ulihnya ni..bising banar ya di dapur..mengiaow2...guring limpang..mentang2 musim mengawan cheh~ kambang bna ...





petang atu tengah ku sibuk2 bekeraja pat office tibe2 ja antu jelangkung ani dtg...siapa lagi kalau bukan anak cina yg selalu dtg mengacau2 ah..amai bnar tangannya..ku pupuh ..ku ikat ..ku lantak udah tangannya masih lagi ia lincah cam ular kepanasan. mula2 tu inda ku kan melayan tapi ia ani pandai bah .. umur baru 10 taun tapi ulah mcm antu bepengalaman.


nama anak atu si yen..ehehe kiut muanya..sihat banar...iatah if me becakap sama ia mcm nada bah..mcm peumuran ku jua..malas tah ku kan bemanja sama kedia..cerita2 n gossip2 segala.

yen- "ate yan..u want candy?"

me-"uuu..candy...what candy?"

yen-"sweet and sour candy.."

*dgn selamba ku makan gula2 nya ..

yen-"i buy that one 0.50 cent .. u pay me 0.10 cent"

*ku kluarkan balik gula2 ah..ku tujah kan pat muanya ha2

me-"eh~ where's your dog? "

yen-" my dog gone already..it's my aunt fault.."

me-"why? what your aunt do?"

yen-"she open the door and let the dog loose"

me-"owh"

yen" but now i got a new dog..but it's not real..."

apakan ckapnya ani nda ku paham "what you mean not real ? your new dog plastic kah ..robot babitri?"

yen-"ha3 no..no what i mean was.."

alum ia sampat mengexplain ku putung ckpnya "what? ur dog ani apakan..kuyuk bilun? kuyuk pemainan kah?"

yen" haiya~ nolah..i want to say it's not really my dog"

tadi nya kuyuk barunya.."whatever lah :p " sambil ku ckp2 sama ia, sambil atu bekaja ku jua...ia pun turut jua bekaja eh..tangannya nda pandai teranah..singkap sana..singkap sini...

bila ku sasak ku kalitik sampai jua ia ampus..iatah kelamahan nya tu..biar ia tekapar2 atas lantai office ah..

yen" stop already ha3 u see what u done to me?"

me" what do i do meh?"

yen"i got a running nose (selisma) its because of you.."

bowh lagi tia .."wah your nose is running meh..u better catch it..after u dont have nose.."

yen"ha3 no..i said running nose bukan my nose running bah"

eh luan jua majalnya "awu bah running nose.....eh btw ur nose ah~ nda banjir kah"

yen" yes flooded with water u wana see"

me " no.no keep the change..u want tissue?"

yen"no thank you .. i wipe it with your jacket already"

punya la bangang ku mendangar...rupa2 nya di lapkannya ingusnya pat jacket yang ku pakai time atu ha3...

yen" ate yan i love you..~~"

me" i hate you too~!!"

nothing is free...

macam2 saja kan berlaku, bila udah rasa kan berjimat cermat supaya tak buang duit, macam2 jua masalah yang akan timbul...duit yang ada di tanganku ku hitung...bukannya semakin bertambah malah semakin berkurangan. kan baik kalau ada pokok bah yang daunnya duit keratas...dapat jua di cabut tiap2 hari...buahnya krg duit syiling...tandang saja batangnya...abis beguguran ke tanah "kkacingg!" (in my dreams maybe)...hek ele...mun panas atiku bah ku cabut daun mangga belakang rumah ah biar gundul nda bedaun...lpas atu tampal tia duit



keratas pakai super glue kah ..setipal kah..syiling krg masukkan dlm guni..nah~ ikat pat atas pokok ah..rasa kan menyamankan ati...entah2 udah esuk2 ilang tia kali pokok mangga ah~ kana curi...hah!! banartah usin dlm tangan jadi abu bah tekana grand sale sana sini ah~ mcm ikan bejual di pasar..eh salah!!! mcm orang bejual di pasar...kana laungkan2 jualan murah2...ada case my mom cerita..u nak tau...kita kembali selepas ini...(iklan ali punya tungkat a.k.a tongkat ali da~)


bah selamat kembali ke rancangan "ah~ u bakayuh la sandire~" okeh

al- qisah~~~
si pulan manang adiah~
bersyukur ya pasal rezeki nya betambah~

adiahnya bukan usin syiling ~
atau kuda lumping~

tapi kerita mahal yang bekilau2~
no..bukan m. daud kilau~

kata org sana nya~
dun worry ..it's your's..percuma~
anda cuma perlu isi borang di atas meja~

si pulan pun kesana kan menyain borang~
tapi bila di baca lain tah pulang~

"adiah apa namanya ni? kata percuma!" kata si pulan,
kata aku manang lucky draw, tapi napa mesti byr bulan2
patutnya adiah free ani..nda lagi payah di bayar..ani kapisan~

sori lah wang~ jgn tah di bagi kadiaku adiah~
keep the change...mulih ku dulu ah~



cheh~ p.s " cerita telah ku ubah suai k..bak kata si puteh..aiks (sowi tesabut si puteh ucing ku) i mean..bak kata ong puteh "these story is under construction~!!" haha mun paham bisai..mun nda paham..buat mcm org paham..nda payah ku beceramah..bukannya ari jumat ni.., nway ah~ adaka patut ha~ kalau menang adiah atu o laki draw kah (ops lucky draw bah) ehem...patutnya memang la percuma..nda tah pyh kan keluar usin lagi ..bukannya adiah namanya tue~ bukannya makin sanang..makin susah ada plang ..yo..!

kadang2 ah dalam internet ada iklan kata percuma o free of charge..nda kiralah samada download mp3, games, ebooks etc..pikir tah banar free..tapi bila kan download saja suruhnya sign up which cost $XX.. bejuluran lidah ku ja .. sia sia pun saja...nda ja... *wink wink*